Learning to Love Yourself

Occasionally, we may be in a relationship that is abusive or violent. Sometimes we have such a low opinion of ourselves that we magnetize someone into our lives that will "punish" us in a way we subconsciously feel we deserve to be punished. This is not an uncommon pattern in people who were abused as children. Needless to say, anyone who abuses another person, physically, mentally or emotionally does not love or respect him/herself. People who are so severely programmed may not be able to start Loving themselves just by experiencing our Love. As we begin to Love ourselves, however, we will extricate ourselves from abusive situations. We will no longer tolerate violence or abuse of any kind.  Sometimes, the fear of leaving a relationship is greater than the fear of abuse, but I promise you, when you begin Loving yourself, you will magnetize such wonderful people into your life that you will gladly let go of destructive relationships.

The only reason we believe we are stupid or worthless or failures is because we affirmed those lies to ourselves over and over again throughout our lifetime. Now, to reprogram ourselves, we must begin daily affirming the TRUTH.

It is time now to take that exercises a step further and reach into an even higher level of our potential. Instead of just listing the things we Love and respect about ourselves or writing down the things we Love and respect in other people, we need to tap into our limitless God Selves. Before beginning your list, quiet yourself and take time to feel centered and connected with your Heart. Feel the Love of God flowing through the Stargate of your Heart and say to yourself, "If I have no limitations-no time and space limitations, no family limitations, no financial limitations, etc., and I could instantly be the most positive, whole, complete, successful, prosperous, effective Loving Human Being on Earth, who would I be, and what would I do?" Then begin writing down the thoughts that flow into your mind. Write them in the present tense beginning each statement with I AM. Don't feel self-centered or conceited. Don't censure or edit your thoughts; just allow the creative ideas to surge forth. Let go of any nagging thoughts of self-ridicule or self-doubt, and let the vision you are experiencing register in your feelings.

There is an expression that states, "What the mind can conceive, the person can achieve," but the Truth is that the most glorious, perfect person you can possibly imagine being in this moment is going to barely scratch the surface of who you really are and who you are capable of becoming. This list will serve as the blueprint and the beginning thought-form for the "new you." This will be the new program, the new belief system and the new sense of identity you will start emulating, but it is just the beginning. As you focus on this wonderful vision of yourself, it will grow and evolve.

Remember, whatever you put your attention and energy into, you bring into form. Whoever you believe you are, you become. Our thoughts are creative. So, what you are actually doing is creating a new program that you will put into the computer of your brain to reprogram your old patterns of unworthiness and low self-esteem. Your brain really is your computer system and you know the expression in computer talk, "garbage in, and garbage out." Well, that is exactly what you have been doing. Now, it's time to remove the old floppy disc with the erroneous program on it, and replace it with a wonderful new floppy disc program. You need to focus on your list everyday, and affirm the Truth of your vision with deep feeling. You need to let go of all disbelief, and ask your God Self to Transmute all resistance, all interference, all blocks, all doubts that are, in any way, preventing you from manifesting the vision of the "new you." As this vision begins to register in your feelings as a true identity, you will act out of this
new sense of identity, and you will actually become your vision.

In the beginning, your vision will just feel like empty words. You'll hear the voice of your lower human ego saying, "Who do you think you're kidding?" But, continue to repeat the affirmations everyday anyway. You must "fake it till you make it." Remember, the only reason you have low self-esteem is because you, or other people in your life, affirmed that you were worthless over and over again until it finally began to register as Truth, and you eventually accepted that lie as a sense of identity. Now you are doing the opposite. You are going to be affirming the TRUTH of your innate value, with limitless potential, and day-by-day this identity will begin registering as real.

The following is an example to give you an idea of what your list might include, but every person is unique, and only your God Presence can reveal to you your perfect vision and blueprint, so be sure and make your own list.

I AM recognizing who I AM, and I Love and respect myself.

I AM continually manifesting wonderful, Loving relationships in my life.

I AM expressing Limitless Physical Perfection, slim, firm, flawless form, Eternal Youth, Vibrant Health, Radiant Beauty, perfect eating and drinking habits.

I AM Divine respect for my four lower bodies: physical, enteric, mental and emotional.

I Love every aspect of myself, including my sexuality.

I AM in a fulfilling, creative and financially rewarding job.

I AM open and receptive to God's Limitless flow of Abundance.

I AM an exponent and example of Divine Family Life, including my place in the family of Humanity.

I AM expressing my highest potential as a daughter/son; wife/husband; mother/father; grandmother/grandfather; sister/brother; woman/man; friend; relative; co-worker; Human Being; Earth steward; teacher, and example.

I AM Divine Happiness, Humor, Laughter, Joy and Fun.

I AM Divine Confidence, Self-Esteem, Trust, Integrity, Honesty, Truth, Reverence for all Life, Acceptance, Tolerance and Inner Knowing.

I AM Divine thoughts, words, actions and feelings.

I AM Divine Illumination, perfect speech, communication, listening, writing and learning.

I AM Transfiguration, Limitless Transmutation, Hope, Ascension and every other conceivable Divine Quality of God.

I AM the perfect manifestation of my Divine Plan and the Divine Plan of Beloved Mother Earth and all Creation.

I AM in constant communication with the Realms of Eternal Truth and the Divine Heart and Mind of God.

I AM permanently manifesting, in my daily, tangible life, the perfection of Heaven on Earth.

I AM an exponent of Divine Government, human rights, animal rights, Mother Earth's rights and Liberation and Freedom.

I AM perpetually held in the embrace of God's invincible Protection, and with every breath I take, I AM expanding the borders of the Kingdom of my Father-Mother God.

Learning to Love you is a process that will require every bit of your patience, acceptance and tolerance. It will require the full power of your attention and your constant thoughts and feelings. You cannot change a lifetime, probably hundreds of lifetimes of believing you are worthless, into recognizing you are actually a Divine Being with limitless potential, by just affirming the positive vision of the "new you" for five minutes a day.

We are such creatures of habit that if we aren't consciously focusing on what we want to manifest in our lives and monitoring our thoughts and feelings constantly, in no time, we will fall back into the dysfunctional patterns of self-flagellation. Obviously, if you affirm your value and self-worth for five minutes a day and then beat yourself up for the rest of the day, you're not going to succeed in changing your self-image. Remember, "The price of freedom is eternal vigilance." You must consistently, throughout the day, monitor your thoughts and ask yourself, "What am I thinking and feeling about myself now? And how about now? And how about now?" If you aren't feeling good about yourself, you need to immediately correct the situation. Say to yourself, "No, that is an old erroneous thought pattern, and it is no longer who I AM. I AM a valuable, Lovable person." Then, think of the list you have written of the "new you," and begin affirming it with deep feeling.

Keep the list in your pocket, if you want to, or just take one statement on the list and affirm it over and over again until it starts to feel true. Then, affirm the next statement, then the next. Sometimes, it helps to visualize yourself walking through Golden Doors, and as the doors close behind you, envision all of the old patterns of low self-esteem are left behind the door. When an old negative thought or feeling pops up, just consciously put it on the other side of the door, in your mind's eye, and flood it with Violet Fire. Affirm that this is part of the past and no longer appropriate for you to think about or feel. Look at what is coming up, and ask yourself, "What do I want to be expressing in my life instead of this old negative belief about myself?" Then focus on what you want to be expressing instead of what you don't want to be expressing.

Initially, this process feels very uncomfortable. It feels self-obsessive and self-centered. It may even feel egotistical. Normally, people are so use to telling themselves they are worthless that sometimes it even feels like self-deception. But, even in the face of all of this resistance, you must continue the exercises in spite of how uncomfortable you feel. Often, the discomfort is generated by the lower human ego, which is fear-based. This fragmented aspect of your personality has thrived on your misery and doesn't want to let go of its control. It is actually throwing a temper tantrum to prevent your God Presence from taking full control of your vehicles because it thinks it is going to die if that happens.

The next step in learning to Love you is taking care of yourself. This change in your behavior will feel even more foreign than the positive affirmations. This step means you actually have to ask yourself in every situation, "What is the highest good for me?" That thought normally sends shock waves through people. Imagine the audacity of thinking of you first. Doesn't that totally conflict with everything you have ever been taught? Well, it conflicts with everything we have all been taught, and that is why we are so co-dependent and dysfunctional.

The important thing to understand about this step is that you are lifting up in consciousness, and you are transcending your lower human ego. Consequently, when you ask, "Is this the highest good for me?” you must ask this question to your God Presence and not your human ego. Your human ego is self-obsessive and operates strictly to gratify your physical senses. It is also based in fear, so when it responds to that question, the answer will always be selfish, greedy and usually at the expense of everybody else. In other words, the "dog- eat-dog," "looking out for number one" syndrome. But, when you ask your God Presence that question, that aspect of your Being is always functioning on all levels with regard to the highest good for all concerned.

Your God Presence is always prompting you forward to your highest potential, and It clearly knows that this must be accomplished with reverence for all life. It will never be true that if you fulfill your highest good, other people or other life forms will be hurt in the process. Your Divine Plan just doesn't conflict like that. This means that if you are truly doing what is the highest good for you in a particular situation, IT WILL ALSO BE THE HIGHEST GOOD FOR EVERYONE ELSE INVOLVED, even if they don't perceive it that way. It will never be the case that if you are fulfilling your Divine Plan, it is preventing someone else from fulfilling his or her Divine Plan. When there seems to be a real conflict, then you must realize that someone's human ego is involved and not they’re God Presence.

Another thing you must understand in this step is that you are not helping anyone by being a martyr and sacrificing what is right for you just to make someone else happy. Even if you are giving them what they want, if you have had to sacrifice what is right for you in the process, it is not going to be for their highest good. When people make these self-sacrifices, it is because they want to be Loved and approved of; they also want to be accepted. The problem is that you are actually invalidating yourself and negating your value as a Human Being when you make decisions to try and be what everybody else wants you to be, instead of who you are.

For one thing, it is impossible to fulfill everybody's expectations, so you are always disappointing someone. When you try to be what everybody else wants you to be, you become so confused you totally lose touch with who you are and what you are supposed to be doing to fulfill your Divine Plan on Earth. This is really a tragedy that consistently holds you in bondage.

When you are not accomplishing your Divine Purpose and reason for Being, no matter what you do, you never feel fulfilled. You will always feel like something is missing in your life, and you experience dissatisfaction with everything you attempt. This, once again, leads into failure consciousness and low self-esteem. Then the vicious circle begins all over again.